Integrity on Strike!

As I watched game two of the 2005 World Series Sunday night, I was impressed with the skills exhibited by the players: their pinpoint pitches, their ability to control nerves in pressure packed at-bats, their ability to field sharply hit balls, and their desire to win baseball’s most coveted award. These are the best of the best, the men that our kids emulate, the players that they idolize.

Baseball is a game of inches. Often times the balance of a game is determined by an umpire’s subjective call. SUBJECTIVE … when a judgement call is made from an imperfect point of view (without slow-motion) that a player has no control over. Sunday night I watched as a batter bailed out on a high, inside pitch and proceeded to take first base at the direction of the umpire, without a flinch. At first glance, it looked like a good call – the ball was inside, the batter headed to first without hesitation, the umpire immediately called a hit batsman. On closer inspection, the ball unmistakably deflected off the bat … never touching the batter. Subjective? Yes, but here is a case where the player could have exercised some control over the call.

I played a lot of baseball in my formative years. A batter knows without a doubt when he has been hit, and he knows without a doubt when he has NOT been hit. While I may be impressed with the talent of the player, I have no RESPECT for him. Integrity is on strike … not just in sports, but in America. Our society has come to view it as the proper response to take advantage when a bad call goes our way, when we receive too much change, or when a bill has an error in our favor. It hasn’t always been that way in this country. There was a time when a REAL man would quietly say “it didn’t hit me”. No theatrics, no pat on the back, just the simple, honest truth to preserve the integrity – not the integrity of the game, but the integrity of the man.

I don’t know whether to be more disappointed in the player or in the public. In the 48 hours following the incident, I have heard endless banter on radio and television regarding the impact of the bad call, but not a word about the lack of moral character. In the end, I believe the example that was set by a lack of integrity will have a much bigger impact on our society than the errant call. I pray that my children will choose role models with the strength of moral character to tell the truth even when the result may be unfavorable.

I’m looking for someone to respect … will anyone step up to the plate?

Surviving Supplications

My father wrote the following for the church bulletin this week. I couldn't help posting it ...

It is interesting that Scripture doesn’t say, “Ask without ceasing.” But I’m afraid a great many read it that way. So, how do we survive when our supplications seem to go unheard?

I had spent a couple of wonderful days with two of my grandsons recently. Then I took them and their mother to Searcy where their father was leading a seminar for the Physical Sciences Department. They would be going home to Alabama soon and I needed to return to Russellville. But parting was difficult. The seven-year-old wept on my shoulder and begged me not to go. The four-year-old sat on my knee and kept saying, “Please, Papa. Please don’t go. Please, Papa.” But Papa had to go. As I walked down the hall of the Science Building I heard the voice pleading after me, echoing mournfully, praying, “Please, Papa. Please don’t go. Please, Papa.” And the sobs of the other added accompaniment. Broken hearts all around.

How will those boys survive their unanswered supplications? They will continue to love their Papa anyway, and be glad to see him on the next visit. And they will learn over time that we all have responsibilities to meet, and that there are bigger issues in life than our desires at the moment.

Prayer is really that simple. It always seems to be a hot topic because of misunderstandings, and people have been known to lose faith over “unanswered prayer” (read that, “not getting my way.”) But the faithful continue to love God anyway and rejoice in His presence, and learn over time that God is working all things together for our good even if we don’t understand it, and that there are bigger issues than my desires at the moment.

Three other grandchildren are in Iowa. My daughter is pregnant with her fourth. Already pregnant, mind you. One baby, not twins. And the two oldest are praying about the sex of the new baby. One is praying for a boy. The other is praying for a girl. Do we ever put God in untenable positions? Do we ever expect the unreasonable? Do we ever pray for rain when our neighbor is praying for sunshine? What’s God to do?

Knowing that God’s will is that all men have the free will to determine for themselves what they will believe and do, do we ever pray that God will override that free will and save them anyway? Knowing that it is “appointed unto men once to die”, do we ever pray for them to live beyond reasonable expectations?

Do we ever lose faith because we don’t have enough faith that God is in control, that He loves us, and that He knows best? My grandkids don’t. I’m always their Papa. They always love me. And they don’t ever want me to leave. “A little child shall lead them.” So.....

Dear God. You will always be my Father. I will always love you. And I don’t ever want You to leave.

You Make it Look Easy

After my older son saw his younger brother out pushing his plastic lawn mower beside me while I was cutting the grass, he couldn't resist grabbing the plastic mower and doing the same. I thought this might be a good time to start training my lawn-mowing replacement, so I called him over to push the lawn mower. His eyes widened and he loved every minute of it, though he struggled to make the turns and had a hard time keeping up with the self propelled mower. After we finished he said "Dad, you sure make mowing the grass look easy ... that's a lot harder than it looks!"

You know, it's really NOT that difficult, and I could have finished the job sooner if I had just done it myself, but I would have missed the opportunity to start the process of training my son if I had focused only on the expedient solution. This is true in the work place, in the church, in the family, in all of life ... taking the time to teach a skill or a concept provides priceless interaction and may teach skills that make things that initially seem difficult eventually seem easy. It may also work you out of a job ... like mowing the lawn!

Shadow in the Grass

This morning, I woke up with a thousand things to do as we prepared for a family trip to Arkansas. Since the grass, I mean weeds, have needed mowing for the past three weeks, I decided to attack them prior to hitting the road. I had finished about half of the yard when I noticed my 4-year old running to the garage to get his plactic lawn mower, and he proceeded to be my "shadow in the grass". He stopped when I would stop, he turned when I would turn, and completely followed my every move because he wanted to be just like dad. There are lots of things I hope he learns from me, but also lots of things I need to be aware that he IS learning from me, whether I want him to or not. Attitudes, reactions, treatment of friends, handling of difficult situations are all things that he will try to handle just like me. Wow ... that's pressure. The words of the Phillips, Craig, and Dean song come to mind- "Lord, I want to be just like You, 'cause he wants to be just like me ...".

The End of an Age

One of my favorite times of day as a father is bedtime. In addition to frantically trying to get the kids in bed so I can enjoy a few quiet minutes before going to bed myself, are mixed in some of the most memorable moments and conversations with my children. Every family, in fact every parent, has his or her standard bedtime routine … cleaning up, questions about the day’s activities, and then there are the heart-to-heart exchanges in which you share with your kids how much you love them and how important they are to you and to your family. One of the ways that I’ve approached this is to ask my children every single day at the end of the day who my favorite X year old is. Their answers range from a quick “me” or “I am” to a silly response like “mommy”, followed by a flood of giggles. Several years ago my oldest son caught me off guard. We went through the normal bedtime routine, and once again, I asked him who my favorite boy was. He paused and looked at me and then asked “Daddy, why do you ask me that every night?”

A little surprised by the serious tone of the question, I thought about my answer for a minute. In truth there are lots of reasons for asking the question and making sure he knows the answer. It could be to boost his confidence. It could be to let him know how important he is to me. It could be to pick him up at the end of a rough day. But his question was more focused … he wanted to know why the repetition was necessary. Why do you ask me that EVERY NIGHT?”

After pondering the possible responses, I believe God provided some clarity, and I told him that I asked him the same question every night because I never want him to forget that he is my favorite boy. Regardless of what he might do or say, regardless of where he might be and what trouble he might get into, that he is my favorite. I never want him to forget that I love him with all of my heart and would do anything to protect or save him. I never want him to forget that he is more important to me than “me”. Rather proud of my answer and expecting a response something like “WOW, daddy, what great insight … thanks”, I looked down at my son and he said “OK” and rolled over and went to sleep.

Today, my youngest son turned four. While its fun to see him growing and getting older, the realization that I'll never be able to say "Who is my favorite three-year old?" has led to much reflection. The end of an age ... I have been blessed to witness each day of that age, and I will miss it!